if it ain't got no swing
The mood swings have been vicious recently. 48 hours ago I was scraping my shins on the bottom…dark walls of just…well…it had felt like I had lost. Game over.
But I dragged my sorry ass into work, put on my best game face, and got through it. And then…mere minutes after the final whistle had gone, the funny games began. Sure, it ended up being all in my head…like I knew it was…like I always know…but I still didn’t believe. I was convinced of the opposite. Some cruel joke being played on me. Lies and deceit. All that jazz.
No…just me again, playing tricks.
But before I knew the truth, before my questions had been answered, I woke up on the right side of the bed this morning and put on that game face again, only this time, the smile was real. And it was coming from the inside too. Why…I have no idea. Resignation? Psychotic detachment? Did the funny games of the night before somehow prepare me, force me to bottom out so I could rise again? Or was I just having a good day...even I have those every once in a while!
No matter what was going on today...it was nice. I had a real spring in my step that, well, if it came from where I think it may have come from...I owe someone a big thanks!
It really is all about attitude.
And confidence…can’t forget about confidence.
Now that its over, and the sun is going down, I can feel the shadows calling once again.
But I dragged my sorry ass into work, put on my best game face, and got through it. And then…mere minutes after the final whistle had gone, the funny games began. Sure, it ended up being all in my head…like I knew it was…like I always know…but I still didn’t believe. I was convinced of the opposite. Some cruel joke being played on me. Lies and deceit. All that jazz.
No…just me again, playing tricks.
But before I knew the truth, before my questions had been answered, I woke up on the right side of the bed this morning and put on that game face again, only this time, the smile was real. And it was coming from the inside too. Why…I have no idea. Resignation? Psychotic detachment? Did the funny games of the night before somehow prepare me, force me to bottom out so I could rise again? Or was I just having a good day...even I have those every once in a while!
No matter what was going on today...it was nice. I had a real spring in my step that, well, if it came from where I think it may have come from...I owe someone a big thanks!
It really is all about attitude.
And confidence…can’t forget about confidence.
Now that its over, and the sun is going down, I can feel the shadows calling once again.
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